The Green-Eyed Monster Envy

Ok here it is again Terrible Tuesday and I am still contributing to the sin sister carnival with my fifth sin post-oh that's right I am nearly there two more after this and I get to put all this introspection away until I offload it onto my shrink in 20 years.

Today's post was going to be a wickedly delicious lust post, I don't see anything really wrong with lust so I had planned on doing quite a bit of it last Thursday at a country concert that the girls and I were attending. You saw the "was going to" and the "had planned" so you know that will not be the case. What I forgot when planning the girls night out was that when you get a bunch of girls together...well you just can't plan anything.

So I didn't get to lust..much, I mean I am not blind, there was one cute cowpoke that caught my eye, but it was brief and not worth going into much detail. For shame!! I will be at the beach this weekend so we will try for a hottie surfer boy post next week. So today's or rather tonight's post, since I have pushed it off, is going to be about envy. You see there was a little drama on the girls night out and it got me thinking about that little green devil, envy.

I am not an envy girl, sure every so often I see someone or something that gets me thinking wouldn't it be nice, but then just as often I see someone or some-many in a position that I am glad I am not in. So all in all I believe life balances out, gives a little here, takes a little there, but in the end its all square. That's just me. But now do I know some envy dwellers, afraid I do, and when I was looking around for some envy quotes I found one that really sums it up.

"Malice that cannot speak its name, cold-blooded but secret hostility, impotent desire, hidden rancor and spite -- all cluster at the center of envy. Envy clouds thought, writes Joseph Epstein, clobbers generosity, precludes any hope of serenity, and ends in shriveling the heart. Of the seven deadly sins, he concludes, only envy is no fun at all."

Yeah I got to agree here with Mr. Epstein, with Greed, Gluttony, Sloth, Vanity, and even Wrath there is some enjoyment-at least in the beginning anyway. You see I didn't put LUST in there because I am just not sure I think lust is a sin?!? Envy just makes you miserable and makes everyone around you want to knock you out (ouch there is that wrath again-made me smile though), I am not sure why people would let themselves get caught up in this one. Where's the tiniest bit of gratification in this one, we haven't gotten to how vain I am so maybe that's why I am not gettin it?

The only thing I can really say about the sin of envy, besides the punishment not being that bad supposedly you go to hell and are put in "freezing" water (well give me a break if I am in hell cold water is exactly where I want be! You know now that I think about it I thought hell was not supposed to have ice water isn't that what they are all screaming for? Maybe I should rethink my stance on this one just incase I end up there, I wonder if faking envy is good enough to get the punishment for it?) What I was trying to say, before I got off on that tangent, is that I feel sorry for those individuals that are consumed by this little green devil. Life is too short and too precious to be trying to live someone else's existence, be thankful for the gifts you are given, and chalk the rest up to shit happens. No seriously, for some the hard times can be excruciatingly hard, but if you can make it through and somehow even learn from them, the good times are that much sweeter.

So drop the green devil because you need to make room for the sweetness of the lust angel doesn't that sound like more fun!! I say angel because cupid does not look like a devil to me, and don't try telling me he represents true love, he's naked that is lust! See you next week, I don't know about the time, but the place will be the same.

Don’t forget to check out the other Sin Sisters:

Ssgreylord

Huckdoll

Caffeine Court

Secrets of a Black Heart

CableGirl

April

Technorati Tags: Envy,Joseph Epstein,Lust is better,Seven Deadly Sins,There is ice water in hell

Seven Deadly Sins...Avarice/Greed

It is that time again… Terrible Tuesday with The Seven Deadly Sin Carnival! For the love of Joseph I cannot believe I have seven weeks of this (that is my sloth talking and I am sure that the love of Joseph thing is blasphemy so I am off to a good start here). I picked Avarice this week, partly because I forgot what it meant, so I thought it might not apply to me, hence an easy post. Wrong! Avarice boys and girls is another word for GREED, that little green devil that makes you ravenous for the Qwan.

Honestly Greed and Gluttony are synonymous, but those crazy Christians like to keep you on your toes, so they throw the same thing in under a different name. No actually I think Gluttony is more sustenance based and Greed is more monetary…we all know the Scrooge story don’t we? So how am I Greedy…I guess if I am going to dig deep here I am probably greedy for things. I have a lot of things, closets, a garage, an extra bedroom full of things. I am a bit of a pack rat I think, I am told I could cloth a developing country and the shoe thing (well we just won’t get into that).


In my defense I do try to offset my greed with helping others, I want nice things but in return for that I work hard and I give back. I’ve been told that I do not charge enough for my services, if you ask anyone who’s worked with me they will tell you I am more interested in getting the job done right then how much I am going to make from it. Don’t get me wrong, like I said I want nice things, so I am no Saint here but I get real joy out of helping someone else.


Now that I threw in that little side note to make myself look better -next posts are definitely pride & vanity, I should look around and give some of this stuff away. Take the less is more road, there are so many people out there that could benefit from the stuff I take for granted. Besides a natural disaster could hit here tomorrow and all of this stuff would mean nothing! That was that cute little angel on my left shoulder, that trampy little devil on my right shoulder is saying, “if you get rid of some of this stuff (Ebay) you could get that alkaline water thing you want!!“ It is a constant struggle really, to find that healthy balance of giving and receiving.


So you tell me is it ok to have more than some, not as much as others, but more than you truly need? What is true greed, how do you quantify it? According to Wikipedia the accumulation of possessions that denies others legitimate needs is greed. That is rather ambiguous, how should I know if I am denying someone else, I am no Scrooge but I am no Gandhi either. In my work I help others but I am rewarded for that so does that count?


I think it is all a matter of perspective, I look at Warren Buffet and Bill Gates, both ridiculously wealthy men and both incredible givers. Warren lives frugally while Bill lives “a bit” more lavishly, but are they Greedy men? I would say maybe a little here and a little there but overall (disclaimer here I don’t know them personally so if one turns out to be a serial killer there was no way I could have known) I think they are good people who have done a great deal for others. In the end if someone can say that about me I will know I did alright.


And I will not try and take all those shoes with me when I go, I will let them go to those who need them most – excluding a pair of Manolo Blahniks. I mean I have to wear something and those are the only ones that will go with the outfit!

Don't forget to check out the other carnival members: (I am sure there are more these are the ones I know of)

Huckdoll
Caffeine Court
Secrets of a Black Heart
CableGirl

Seven Deadly Sins.....Sloth

It is Terrible Tuesday again and I have another Seven Deadly Sin post to contribute to the carnival. I chose Gluttony last week and this week I am doing Sloth. I decided to participate in this carnival because it just sounded cool, but I have found in writing these posts that it is actually quite cathartic. I spent a year in Catholic prison (that is a Catholic high school) which I chose of my own accord because I wanted to learn something. I have to admit I learned a lot, but I also closed off to a lot, like some of the lessons in the Seven Deadly Sins. A sin for a Catholic (for the type of Catholic I was-don't want to offend anyone) is something to confess to your priest and then move on, I never looked at how these “sins” could impact personal growth, who knew I would get that lesson from a blog!!



Sloth is defined as spiritual and/or actual apathy or laziness. Sloth can also concern wasting due to lack of use or allowing entropy, expanding into almost any person, place, thing, skills, or intangible ideal that would require maintenance, refinement and/or support to continue to exist.

Sloth is a tricky one, because most people have a tendency to, at some point, want to slack off or shirk responsibilities. So when is a propensity to doing something actually considered a regularity or an overriding character flaw?


When I think of sloth I think of some slacker, with bad hygiene, living in a dump that spends their life just squeaking by. A slothful person is lazy, has no goals, no drive, no positive momentum, and really doesn’t contribute much to the whole scheme of things. But is it really that cut and dry?


Over the last 5 to 6 years work has gotten the majority of my attention, it has taken everything in me to remember that family, friends, and life outside of work is important. If there is apathy towards any portion of my life it is in my personal life, but that is perfectly acceptable right? Because I am a “successful” contributing member of society! I am single answerable to no one. I am a model to look up to in my work ethic and industry knowledge. I have a good portion of the material things that you are supposed to want to have, so I can’t possibly be slothful.


According to Tyler Durden (The beautiful chaos creator in Fight Club) “F*#k off with your sofa units and strine green stripe patterns, I say never be complete, I say stop being perfect, I say let... lets evolve, let the chips fall where they may.”


I tend to put all my efforts into one direction, while neglecting everything else. Entropy, a lack of pattern or organization, a tendency for all matter and energy in the universe to evolve toward a state of inert uniformity -this definition would contradict my model life and actually prove that I am very slothful. In almost every area of my life outside of work I am stagnant; I have pushed life to tomorrow or the day after. I neglect myself, my family, and friends so I can fulfill some crazy dream to be the best most successful girl on the planet.


So now another Tyler Durden quote, “a question of etiquette - as I pass, do I give you the ass or the crotch?” Ha ha…that one just makes me laugh the quote I really wanted to use is, “You have to know the answer to this question! If you died right now, how would you feel about your life?”


This is a question that I started asking myself after a kidney stone in 2006, after the mortgage meltdown in 2007, and have continued to ask myself over the last 5 months, I am a slow to act sometimes. This is a little scary because I can look back at major turning points, good and bad, in my life and they all started with that question. Even the road that lead me to my current situation was predicated by that query. So 5 months ago I looked at what we have now established as a very slothful existence, and decided I needed to make a change. If I died tomorrow I would feel that I had squandered, wasted, and misspent a good portion of the last 6 years (yes I know that all those words mean the same thing - I just thought I needed to say it three times).


I have made some major changes over the last 2 years / 3 months and I continue to push forward in my new less slothful life. It is truly hard though. It is so tantalizing to want to revert back to, an easy, work driven, uncomplicated, yet stressful existence. Life is messy, the more interaction you have with family, friends, and new people tends to bring overwhelming chaos to a rather dull but comfortable existence. I also hate cleaning my house so I need to make enough money to pay someone else to do it or I will still be slothful because my house won’t be clean. See the issues here….but I am striving to be more balanced and to be present in the lives of those around me.


Some of the changes:


I am strategically moving away from a job that I just exist in to a job I love


Taking time throughout the year to do things for myself and with my family and friends


Finding my purpose and passion and incorporating it in all that I do.


I can understand why sloth would be considered a sin, because it just seems like a travesty to squander life, and yet so easy to do. So check back in a year and let’s see if I have let the sloth monster gobble me back up or if I have continued on my “enlightened” path.



Don't forget to check out the other carnival members:



Huckdoll

Caffeine Court

Secrets of a Black Heart

CableGirl